posted by nathan at 6:50 AMApril 9th, 2010

what does this really mean?

I woke up this morning thinking about the last sentence I say in Paul's aria from "Amelia" (a new opera by Daron Hagen that is being premiered at Seattle Opera next month). The setting is this: Paul is in his wife's hospital room. Amelia, his wife, is nine months pregnant and is due at any time, but she is in a coma. The reason for this condition is a mystery to the doctors, but to the audience we may think that it has something to do with her mind needing to come to terms with the death of her father. Her father, Dodge, was killed (MIA) in a bombing mission in Vietnam. So, as Paul is sitting with Amelia quietly begging her to not die he finds a letter that Dodge had sent his wife and child before the bombing run. The letter reads as follows:

My two loves,

The grim reaper called today. It's go on the Haiphong power plant. I am leading eight planes and fully expect heavy opposition. I am at peace within myself. I have no fear but write for reality's sake. If I'm shot down and should eject please, please know that I will bear whatever lies ahead. If I am lost do not despair. Keep faith. Go forward. Never forget how thankful I am and how happy you have made me.
You deserve every good thing in life, especially, love. So leave the doors open.

I love you always,

Dodge


So, I'm wondering why "I love you always" sounds "funny" to me. I suppose because the letter is sort of a "goodbye" letter that I think he should say, "I'll love you always". If the phrase were "I always love you" or "I'll always love you" or "I've always loved you" it gives a completely different meaning to the letter. "I've always loved you" to my ears implies that he was perhaps a cold man and had never said it before..... "I'll always love you" seems to mean that he'll love them both beyond the grave. "I always love you" is a bit mushy and sounds just "wrong" to my ears.

So, we're left with "I love you always" meaning I love you, I loved you and I will love you, but doesn't have that "goodbye" feeling that the letter implies OR just "I love you".

These are the things I think about :)

At the moment I think the simpler salutation is the more effective choice.